Sacrificial Love

This is a sermon I preached on February 20, 2022.

There is a story about Cyrus, the founder of the Persian Empire. The same Cyrus mentioned in the books of Ezra, Daniel and Isaiah who also wrote a proclamation to allow the Israelites to return from their exile.

In this story that is not in the Bible, he once had captured a prince and his family.

When they came before him, the monarch asked the prince, "What will you give me to release you?"

"The half of my wealth," was his reply.

"And what will you give me to release your children?"

"Everything I possess," he said.

"And what will you give for me to release your wife?"

"Your Majesty, I will give myself."

Cyrus was so moved by the man’s devotion that he freed them all.

As they returned home, the prince said to his wife, "Wasn't Cyrus a handsome man!"

With a look of deep love for her husband, she said to him, "I didn't notice.

I could only keep my eyes on you- -the one who was willing to give himself for me."

Today, I want us to look at sacrificial love. Real true love that is the type of love that God wants every one of us who believe in Him to have with others.

Before we go in depth with that I want to start by looking at the

I. Seven types of love

In Galatians 4:4 it says,

“But when the fullness of the time had come, God sent forth His Son, born of a woman, born under the law,”

Another way you could say this verse is “when the time was right and everything was in place the way God wanted it, He sent Jesus to earth.

Part of the fullness of time was the world was ready to receive the message of salvation. The Roman Empire was at its strongest. They had peace throughout the empire at that time. They had built roads that allowed people like the Apostles and other Christians to travel throughout the empire and beyond with the Gospel.

Lastly, I personally think that one factor was the development of the Greek language. I spent three years studying Greek under a pastor who was my mentor. I learned how unique that language was. It is the most precise of all languages.

I found an old chart of the different ways to say one word. On this chart the word luw, which means to loose or release, can be spelled over 350 ways to give it a different meaning.

Not only the difference in spelling but they had a wide range in vocabulary so there would be no doubt in understanding the meaning that the writer was trying to say.

Take the word ‘love’. In English we have one word – love. It can mean romantic love, family love, friendship love, whatever, it depends on the context.

In Greek, I know of at least 7 words that are translated into the English as love.

First there is Eros, which is a sensual form of love. Then there is Ludus, which is playful, flirtatious love like between boyfriend and girlfriend.

Third, the word Pragma was used for love. We get the word pragmatic from it. Pragmatic love was an unromantic form of love that occurred when a common goal was to be achieved.

The world back then was much different then now. Sometimes marriages were arranged for the purpose of alliances between families because it was the pragmatic thing to do.

The fourth kind of love was storge, this was an affectionate type of love for a family member, such as the love of a Mom for her child or a sister with her younger sister.

The fifth kind of love was called mania. This was an obsessive love for someone they couldn’t have or who didn’t love them back.

The sixth type of love and a word often used in the Bible was Philew. Philew is an affectionate regard or friendship with someone. It is the feeling you have for a good friend or buddy. This word is in the name of the city of Philadelphia, which means the city of brotherly love.

The seventh and final word for love in the Greek is agape. Agape is an unconditional, selfless love. It is a sacrificial love that will sacrifice anything for another person, even if that person doesn’t seek to return that love.

The noun form of this word is used 116 times in the New Testament and the verb form of this word is used 142 times. It is an important word in the Bible and one we should know and live by.

An example of this word agape being used is in John 15:13. Jesus was speaking to is disciples in the upper room on the night He would be betrayed and He said to them,

"Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.”

Jesus showed the greatest love by physically dying on the cross so those who believe in Him can have eternal life. He also wants us to show this similar love, not necessarily by dying, but there is a sacrifice that needs to be made to show this love, a sacrificial love.

I have just three things to share today about this sacrificial love. First –

II. Sacrificial love is a Selfless Love

We all know John 3:16,

"For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.”

In this verse is the word agape. God so loved the world. We could talk so much about God’s love for us in this verse. But it’s not John 3:16 I want to talk about, it’s 1 John 3:16. Do you know that verse?

1 John 3: 16 says,

By this we know love, because He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.

I think this verse is just as important to memorize as John 3:16.

The Apostle John says we know what true sacrificial agape love is because Jesus laid down His life for all of us.

John knew what he was talking about because he was there. He watched Jesus die on the cross. He was a witness. He also was a witness to the resurrection and knew that we serve a risen Savior.

But John doesn’t stop there. He goes on to encourage us to lay down our lives for the brethren. The brethren means those sitting right next to you. Your brothers and sisters in Christ.

You might be thinking, Brother Jeff, I might like the person I’m sitting next to, but I’m not so sure I’m ready to die for them like Jesus did.

Well, I’m here to tell you that is not really what John is talking about here. There is another way to lay down one’s life that doesn’t require dying.

Just as there is 7 words for love in the Greek, there are at least 3 words for life that I know of. The first is Bios, which means physical life, including the things we have in this physical life. Bios is used for words in English like Biology, the study of life.

Then there is Zoe. Zoe is the word for life that is used when the Bible talks about eternal life, the life that goes beyond our physical body.

The third word, which is used in 1 John 3:16 is psyche. In English we have words such as psychiatry or psychiatrist which come from this word. Elsewhere in the Bible this word is translated as “soul”.

Our soul is what make each of us unique. It is a combination of our mind and emotions and will that make us who we are. It is also the part of us that makes us selfish and self-centered.

What John is saying when he says we are to lay down our lives is that we should lay down our souls, sacrificing our selfishness and pride for the sake of our brothers and sisters.

John also uses the same word for Jesus. Not only did Jesus lay down His physical life, He laid down His soul as well.

The Apostle Paul in Philippians 2:6-8 put it this way, He said Jesus,

who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God,

but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men.

And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross.

Jesus was God in the flesh. He could have demanded obedience. He could have demonstrated His power in such a way to make others worship Him, but instead He humbled himself so He could fulfill the reason He came.

I think that was what was going through John’s mind when he wrote this verse. He was with Jesus for three years. He saw some amazing things like the transfiguration of Jesus on the top of a mountain. He knew who Jesus was, but also saw how Jesus treated others with kindness and compassion, going out of His way to care for them.

That is the type of love John wants us to have, a selfless sacrificial love.

Secondly, we need to realize that -

III. Sacrificial love is unconditional

To love someone unconditionally is easier said than done. When you say the marriage vows, you vow to love that person for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, but somewhere along the way at least half of the people who say those vows break them.

When the worse comes, they are gone. That is because most people love conditionally. If those conditions are not met, whatever they are, that person stops loving the other person.

Back when I was a pastor of a small church, someone close to me told me that unconditional love was impossible because we are only human.

They were probably right. Unconditional love is impossible if it is being done only by human effort. But with God all things are possible. Right?

God Himself, has given us the ultimate example of sacrificial love that is unconditional.

Romans 5:7-8 says this,

For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die.

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Verse 10 goes on to say,

For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life.

God loved us so much that even while we were His enemies, He paid the ultimate sacrifice through the death of Jesus, so that we could have an eternal relationship with Him.

So many people think love is a feeling. They fall into love and then they fall out of love.

That is not true about agape love. True sacrificial love that can love unconditionally is not a feeling.

It is a way of thinking.

For example, Dolly Madison was the wife of the fourth president of the United States, back in the early 1800’s. She was one of the most popular women in American history. Wherever she went, she charmed and captivated everyone, whether obscure or well-known, whether rich or poor, men and women alike.

She was once asked to explain the secret of her power over others. Surprised by the question Mrs. Madison exclaimed, "Power over people. I have none. I desire none. I merely love everyone."

She had a mindset that she was going to love others. They didn’t have to do anything for her. That was just the way she was.

True sacrificial love that can love unconditionally is also a commitment that never gives up, even in hard times. An example of commitment is Ruth in the book of Ruth in the Old Testament.

She could have left her mother-in-law Naomi after her husband died. She could have gone back to her own people, found a new husband and lived her life.

But instead, she made a commitment to care for her mother-in-law. In Ruth 1:16-17, Ruth said to Naomi,

"Entreat me not to leave you, Or to turn back from following after you; For wherever you go, I will go; And wherever you lodge, I will lodge; Your people shall be my people, And your God, my God.

Where you die, I will die, And there will I be buried. The LORD do so to me, and more also, If anything but death parts you and me."

She made that commitment to care for her mother-in-law, even though it meant an uncertain future. God, though, blessed that commitment, that sacrificial, unconditional love and gave Ruth a husband and Naomi joy in her old age.

True sacrificial love that can love unconditionally is not only a way of thinking and a commitment, true sacrificial love is also an action.

I John 3:17-18 says,

But whoever has this world’s goods, and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him?

My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.

Putting it in other words, let’s not just say we love others. Let’s show that we love others by what we do.

Sometimes that might be a little harder to do with some people than others.

There are some people that seem to do their best to make your life miserable, right?

My own wife could probably say it’s me sometimes that makes her life difficult.

She likes things done a certain way. Ways that make sense. Like there is a pantry door that if left open will hit the refrigerator door when you open it. She has told me several times to close the door when I’m done. What did I do this week? I forget to close the pantry door again.

I’m sure a lot of you wives could probably say something similar about your husbands. We do tend to be forgetful about things like that.

But what about dealing with someone that is really difficult, like a hostile neighbor. Sometimes we need to show love to our enemies and the best way to show your enemy love is by your actions.

Watchman Nee, a Chinese evangelist, tells of a Christian he once knew in China.

He was a rice farmer, and his fields lay high on a mountain. Every day he pumped water into the paddies of new rice. And every morning he returned to find that an unbelieving neighbor who lived down the hill had opened the dikes surrounding the Christian’s field to let the water fill his own.

For a while the Christian ignored the injustice, but at last he became desperate. What should he do? His own rice would die if this continued. How long could it go on? The Christians met together, prayed, and came up with this solution.

The next day the Christian farmer rose early in the morning and first filled his neighbor’s fields; then he attended to his own. Watchman Nee tells how the neighbor became a Christian, his unbelief overcome by a genuine demonstration of a Christian’s love for others.

The one who told me years ago that unconditional love is impossible is correct if you behave like the rest of the world. But we are not to live like the rest of the world. We are to imitate God who is our example of unconditional love.

Ephesians 4:32-5:2 says,

“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you.

Therefore be imitators of God as dear children.

And walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma.

We need to imitate God by the way we think, by keeping our commitments and by our actions, showing the love of God to all we meet.

Now, we have seen that sacrificial love is a selfless love and that sacrificial love is an unconditional love. Now I want to turn our attention to one last point and that is –

IV. Sacrificial love Seeks to Restore Relationships.

I want us to go to John chapter 21 to look at this topic. The events of John 21 happen sometime during the 40 days between the resurrection of Jesus and His ascension.

During that time a handful of His disciples, including Peter were by the Sea of Galilee.

Chapter 21 records a story about them fishing and Jesus showing up at the shore, but what I want to focus on is after all that, Jesus and Peter have some time one on one with each other.

This was probably the first time the two of them were somewhat alone together since before the crucifixion.

If you remember, on the night Jesus was betrayed and arrested, He had told his disciples that all of them would be scattered from Him. In Matthew 26:33 it says,

Peter answered and said to Him, "Even if all are made to stumble because of You, I will never be made to stumble."

In verse 34,

Jesus said to him, "Assuredly, I say to you that this night, before the rooster crows, you will deny Me three times."

That is what happened. Peter denied that he knew the Lord three times, and it was a shameful thing to him that he had failed his Lord.

With that as the background we have Jesus and Peter together in John 21. In verse 15 it says,

So when they had eaten breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, "Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me more than these?" He said to Him, "Yes, Lord; You know that I love You." He said to him, "Feed My lambs."

Jesus asked Peter a question, ‘do you love me more than these?’ I think the ‘more than these’ refer to the other disciples.

After all Peter originally boasted that even if all the others stumbled, he never would. But now that Peter realized his boast was just empty words because he stumbled by denying the Lord.

The Lord in his compassion and love wanted to restore Peter. That is why He asked the question.

There is a little play on words here in the Greek that we can’t see in the English translation.

When Jesus asked ‘do you love me’, He used the word agape. He was asking do you have a deep caring love for me.

Interestingly, Peter did not use the word agape in response. He use the word philew. His answer was ‘I love you like a friend.’

Again Jesus asked, “do you agape me, do you have a deep caring love for me.”

Peter once again the second time said, “I philew you, I love you like a friend.”

I think Peter was dealing with his guilt of failure when he denied knowing Jesus. He was afraid to make any commitment that might fail again.

In John 21:17 it says,

He said to him the third time, "Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?" Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, "Do you love Me?" And he said to Him, "Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You." Jesus said to him, "Feed My sheep.

This time, Jesus didn’t use agape when he asked ‘do you love me?’ Instead He lowered himself to Peter’s level and asked ‘do you love me like a friend Peter?’

I think it was because the Lord lowered Himself to Peter’s level that it affected Peter. It says he grieved because the Lord said basically, ‘do you at least like me Peter?’

I think Peter, almost crying, said to the Lord, “Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You.”

Then Jesus said something interesting. In verses 18 and 19 He said,

"Most assuredly, I say to you, when you were younger, you girded yourself and walked where you wished; but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will gird you and carry you where you do not wish."

This He spoke, signifying by what death he would glorify God. And when He had spoken this, He said to him, "Follow Me."

It seems to me that what He said was in response to Peter saying “Lord, you know all things.” He was saying, yes, I do know all things and I know that one day you will show how much you love me by paying the ultimate price and sacrificing your life for the gospel.

History tells us Peter was taken by men of Emperor Nero to be crucified. Peter felt unworthy to be crucified like Jesus and asked to be hung upside down. Peter died upside down with his arms stretched out like Jesus said.

The last thing Jesus said to Peter here is “follow me.” It’s the same thing He told Peter when the two first met. He told Peter to “follow me and I will make you fishers of men.”

Within a few weeks of this encounter with Jesus, the Lord ascended to heaven and Peter found himself before a multitude of people in Jerusalem.

He was no longer timid or fearful. Boldly he declared the gospel of Jesus Christ to the people and that day 3000 were saved. The love of the Lord had restored Peter’s boldness and his love for the Lord was evident to all.

You see, like Peter, we all have our failures in the past. Those failures can hold us back from doing what we know we should be doing.

Sometimes we need someone to be like Jesus was with Peter. Someone to come along side and encourage us to be what we were meant to be. Someone who will show us our real worth.

Once there was a well-known speaker who started off his seminar by holding up a $20.00 bill. In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?" Hands started going up.

He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you, but first let me do this. He proceeded to crumple the $20 dollar bill up. He then asked, "Who still wants it?" Still the hands were up in the air.

Well, he replied, "What if I do this?" And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty. "Now, who still wants it?" Still the hands went into the air.

"My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what was done to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20.

"Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless.

"But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value. Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still priceless to those who DO love you. Believe me when I say, God does love you.

The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by WHO WE ARE.

"You are special - Don’t EVER forget it." You were special enough that God sent His Son Jesus to die for our sins, so we can spend eternity with Him.

If God loves you that much, how can it be hard for us to love others the way He loves us.

Conclusion

So in my conclusion I want to repeat 1John 3:16, which says,

By this we know love, because He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.

I want to ask you, “are you laying down your life for the brethren?”

Are you putting aside your pride and selfishness so you can truly love others.

Is your love a selfless love?

Is your love for others unconditional?

It’s not easy to love this way, but it is possible by the love God puts in our hearts.

Let’s go out from here today and love others the way God wants us to love them.

Amen.